Monday, August 6, 2018

चुप रह के

क्या खो दिया था चुप रहके ..
और क्या पा लिया था कुछ कह के
"कहना" ? या "चुप रहना" ?
मन चाहता था बस इन्ही दो पर्वतों के बीच बहना I
लेकिन किसी ओर तो ज़रूरी था रुख़ मोड़ना !
कहा तो लफ़्ज़ों की तीखी नोख चीर गयी भावनाओं के बादल को ,
चुप रहा तो समंदर से भी गहरी चोट पहुँची सीने को !
यूँ तो बड़ा ही मुश्किल है समझना कि क्या बदल गया चुप रहके और
क्या संवर गया कुछ कह के I
लेकिन यह संकोच तो ना रहा मन मे की उड़ने दी हमने,
अपने आखों के सामने, अपनी ज़िंदगी की डोर ,
एक दर्शक बनके I 
- The Curious Wizard

Thursday, November 20, 2014

निर्णय (Nirnay )

निर्णय :

ना हम जीते थे ना ही जीते थे वो ,
ना हम हारे थे ना ही उन्हे मिली थी शिकस्त I

हारे तो थे वो लम्हे जिन्होने ईंट बनकर बनाया था यह कहानिओं का आशियाना
हुई थी पराजय उन वादों की जिनके दम से खड़ी थी यह विश्वास की दीवारें I

लाखों कोशिशें की समेटे रखने की सबकुछ और किया बहुत इंतेज़ार की होगा फिर से दिलों मे इकरार ,

बीतता गया समय और बढ़ता रहा वक़्त ,
आशाओं की काल कोठरी मे डाल दिया हमने मन को , ले लिया दिल को हिरासत मे और ढूंढते रहे हम हमारी गुस्ताखियाँ

तेज़ बारिश को देख लोगों ने कहाँ , आ जाती हैं कई बार तूफ़ाने ज़िंदगी में
लेकिन हमारे लिए यह सब उस गवाएँ हुए वक़्त के अश्रुजल थे I

आख़िर सुन ली हमने अपने स्वाभिमान की और कर लिया निश्चय
की ना करेंगे हम अब उनसे आलाप , मगर उठती रही हमारे मन के समंदर मे फिर भी उनके यादों की लहरें I

करते रहे हम इंतेज़ार और इंतेज़ार और इंतेज़ार ! और कहता रहा हमारा मन कि क्यूँ किया था हमने उनपे ऐतबार .

जब तक ना गयी हमारी सोच की रफ़्तार "रुक ", सोचते रहे तब तक हम कि
थी क्या थी हमारी गुस्ताखियाँ जो किया उन्होने हमारे साथ ऐसा " सलूक " .

एक दिन ऐसा वक़्त आया की हमारी यादों की झीलें गयी सूख ,
बदल लिया था दिल ने उनकी ओर से अब अपना रुख़ I
ठान ली हमने निकल आने की उस दलदल से और उतार दिया अपने कंधों से उनके यादों का बोझ.

चल दिए हम उन खुली वादिओं की तरफ जहाँ आज़ादी कर रही थी हमारा इंतज़ार
चले ही थे हम कुछ दूर की आई उनकी आवाज़ ,
"ए परवाने कहाँ चला , देख मैं आ गयी , क्यूँ ना शुरू करें फिर यह कहानी ?

हम मुस्कुराए , उनकी तरफ देखा और कहा , "देर कर दी बहुत , आने मे आपने .
अभी तो ख़तम हुई है हमारी कहानी और शुरू होगी अब एक नयी ज़िंदगानी .अलविदा " I

- The Curious Wizard

Saturday, October 18, 2014

यादें ( Yaadein )

यादों की आँधी ने मोड़ दिया था रुख़ हवा का उस ओर जिस और था उदासिओ का मंज़र और थी अतीत की अंधेरी खाई ! साजिशें थी ये वक़्त की कुछ ऐसी की बाँध लिया था खुद को मन ने ग़म की ज़ंज़ीरों मे और ये बेख़बर दिल अब भी कर रहा था कोशिश ज़िंदा रहने की उन बीती बातों और अल्फाज़ों के बवंडर मे जो कबकि धुएँ की तरह उड़कर मिल चुकी थी बहती हवाओं से !

- The Curious Wizard 

Monday, October 13, 2014

RER Diaries

RER Diaries
I was frantically searching for the bananas I had bought yesterday . Where had I kept them ? They were neither in my store , nor in my fruit basket , not as well in my shopping bag . I had to catch the train to Marseille and I did not want to miss my breakfast before taking on the 3 hour journey . We used to get only muffins and sandwiches in the train café and I did not want to have that . Voila ! I found the bananas . I had kept them on my study table inside my room . Egg toast with two bananas and here I was ready for the trip . I took my overcoat along and locked the door of my apartment . I didn't have much time so decided to take the stairs instead of waiting for the lift . It was a 3 minute walk from my apartment to the Noisiel Station . I had to walk briskly to catch the next available train as trains on weekends arrive at an interval of every 15 minutes.
I reached the Noisiel station . The screen showed the next train is "a quai " (at the platform) . I knew the doors open for no more than 20 seconds so I punched my card at the ticket validation machine and forced myself through the revolving machine bars and as if destiny had planned it, the bars didn't move . They bloody had to not work at this moment . I had around 10 seconds left . I cared little now . I jumped the bar and ran wildly down the stairs thereby unwillingly elbow hitting whoever came by my way . The alarm for "door closing " had rung. I had 5 seconds more to reach . I rushed frantically to the nearest door as soon as I reached the platform . The doors had almost closed but I swinged my backpack towards the closing doors and it worked . It could have been a bad move as well but it worked . The bag got stuck in between and the doors re-opened (automatic sensor for blockage) . I entered comfortably after my bag and could immediately see some grumpy faces giving me those angry glares on delaying the train by a few more seconds . I knew what I did was wrong but I had no other option . I had to board this train to reach in time . I just reached the opposite door and started looking outside to avoid all the unnecessary attention which I had just gathered. The station "Noisy le Grand " after two stops was one of the main stops and I was sure somebody would get down . I saw the lady beside me , near the door , picked up her backpack from the floor and put it on her lap . Being a daily traveller in local trains , I knew she was to get down at the next station . As soon as the train stopped at the next station , the lady stood up . As soon as I saw her stand up , I sat down from behind on her seat . Even before I could realize something this lady was sitting on my lap . I was shocked and let out a loud "ohhh" (not so loud as well ) but these girls have this habit of exaggerating everything . She gave out such a loud scream as if a tiger had just torn off her right arm and she had seen the arm lying in front of her . Again everybody's attention was towards me . I had a quick look at the faces staring at me and there were also the faces who were staring at me at my station where I took the train .I explained to the girl that I thought you will leave so I sat down . She apologised saying , "Yeah I know it was my mistake and actually I was not sure if I have to get down at this station or the next one , I had just stood up to have a look at the map above the door . Sorry " . Within a matter of seconds, her reactions were so hugely contrasting . I wish chameleons , who can change colours as per the environment , could understand humans so that I could tell them showing the girl , " Hey chameleons , look here's the competition" .
I was surprised myself to know that it was not my fault but what the life threatening cry was for that she let out on realizing she had sat down on somebody's lap . She had sat down on somebody's lap and not on a cactus bonsai with nail sized thorns .Anyways I decided to chuck it as its impossible to understand girls . However I was feeling good about myself and decided to have a re-look at the staring faces just to feel assured that it was not my fault . Their faces were still the same as if they had already decided who the troublemaker was and as if they wanted to say , " You are a brown guy so I have judged already that its you who is wrong " . The next station was "Gare de Lyon" and I had to get down here to catch my train .
I generally have this paranoia of getting off my seat and standing near the door a few minutes before the train arrives at the station . This time I had no seat so I moved closer to the exit door . The train stopped at "Gare de lyon"( the high speed train station) and I got down the train pushing myself against a mob of people enthusiastically trying to get into the train and grab a seat . Considering the rush during peak hours in RER A (the train) , they had obviously stopped having faith anymore in something which is called "etiquettes", which is to let the people get out first and then get onto the train . Well I had myself not shown much etiquette today so I just forgave all and myself and took the escalator .
In paris the long distance trains are always at the top floor,below that is the metro line and right at the bottom is the RER train line. I had to climb two floors to get to my train but I was not pressed for time as I was already at my station and I had ten minutes before departure. I punched in my travel ticket before entering the platform .The TGV ( the high speed train in france) no 8173 towards Marseille via Avignon ( a beautiful medieval age town around 30 minutes before Marseille) . My coach number was 6 and seat 14 .I entered my coach ,kept my luggage at the luggage platform beside the coach door and started looking for my seat. 22,23,25 .Oh no! the seat numbers were increasing so I had to come back towards the door. Voila ! here was my seat just beside the coach entry door. I got the seat which actually I didn't want to get. I prefer the two seat ones while travelling .I had got an "espace familial" one which meant 2 facing two and a semi-foldable table separating the oppositely placed chairs. There was nobody in the other 3 seats till them. 5 minutes left for departure and still nobody, I was happy that I will get to travel peacefully as these seats are basically given to families with kids etc. However my happiness was short lived as just a couple of minutes later a young girl with blackglasses accompanied by a middle aged lady entered the coach and placed their purses on the seats.It seemed they perfectly knew where their seats were.
They both (looked like a mother daughter duo ) took off their coats , folded them in a very detailed manner and kept them at the cabin baggage space provided at the top of the seats . The seat next to me was still empty and the bell for doors to close 2 minutes before departure went off . The doors finally closed and I was content that the seat next to me was empty and I could spread my arms . The daughter- mother duo was right in front of me. They said "Bonjour " (hello ) to me .I nodded my head in appreciation and from the look on the mother's face I could understand she did not feel good without a reply. She was expecting a "bonjour" in return .
Now it was the girl's turn .The girl spoke out , "Hi , you are going to Avignon or Marseille ?" . I again nodded my head . Her mother now said , I think you are going to Marseille as not many business people visit Avignon . I nodded my head and smiled . I was in my tuxedo wear ,was sporting a one day beard and had my Rayban wayfarer sunglasses on . I can take the liberty to safely assume that I appeared quite like a decent looking corporate guy .
Two attempts at striking a conversation had failed and I could tell from the mother's face that she was not very pleased with her co-passenger (me) who she was thinking ,was rude and also an étrangère (foreigner) ,thanks to my brown skin and black hair .
The train had just left the station and things had already started to get interesting . I finally managed to glance at the girl . We had entered a small tunnel and the girl still had her black glasses on . I took time to look at her . She was indeed pretty . The makeup shades were perfect on her flawless dusky skin . I just have this thing for girls with a flawless and a dusky skin colour . I find them very attractive . I went back in my memory lane when during my masters studies the girls who used to come from South american countries like Peru and Columbia and were slightly dusky . Oh ! what pretty faces ! Watch them once a day and your day is made . I remembered the girl from Peru in our university . She was not very tall , she was lean , dusky , had a flawless skin and the warmth that she radiated while talking was so just so impressive . Sometimes she used to talk to me outside our hostel and after the conversation , the whole day I used to be in a good mood . Similarly, the girl in front of me looked pretty . Now I wanted to see her eyes but she had still not taken off her glasses . She had thick brown hair and she had so beautifully , like a craftsman , let the front part of her hair fall over the right side of her face and it was touching her arms which she had kept folded so it was safe to assume that she had almost waist length hair . I just love long hair . She had plumpy cheeks and while talking to her mother when she was smiling, I could see the cusp formation on both side of her cheeks beside the nose and believe me, it looked unbelievably beautiful . From time to time the hair which was covering her right ear and a part of her right cheek would come falling off thereby covering the whole right side of her face uptil the nose and immediately she would push them back and unsuccessfully try to park them behind her right ear . The hair on the right side of her face was so meticulously brushed back that it didn't seem to encroach at all her face . She had a high and long pointed nose and it seemed the sunglasses were enjoying the long resting area over the nose and that's the reason they were not coming off to let me have a glance at the eyes . She had this beautiful pearl sized ear-ring hanging from her left ear . She must be wearing one on the right too but it was not visible due to her ever falling and ever flowing hair on that side. I have never been a fan of skinny girls . This girl was a little chubby as well and her slightly plumpy hands and beautifully sized fingers were shining due to sunlight falling on it maybe because of a moisturiser which she might have applied on her hands .She was wearing a black trouser , a sky blue coloured pull over a dark grey coloured shirt with broad , spread-out collars and pink buttons on it . It looked so girly and I just loved it . She had kept her hands on her lap and was holding a silver coulored scarf with pink embroidery on it . She had also folded the end part of her pullover of her hands which made the hand-collars of the dark grey shirt visible just before her palms started .The combination made her look even more elegant , girly and pretty . The sunglasses were completely matching with the trouser's colour . I started imagining that had it been an Indian train , we would have sitting near the window and the wind coming from the open windows would have blown her hair across her face every now and then and that would have looked so pretty on her . Suddenly a I saw just a strand of hair falling over on the right side of her face as well . Things had been looking so perfect till now that I had the sudden urge to put back the hair right in its place myself but quickly came to senses and realized I was just about to commit a humongous error .
Suddenly she spoke up , So what do you do in Marseille ? Her mother too started looking at me with a face which was like ,this time she was sure a reply would come by . Seeing no reply from my side her mother kept staring at me for 30 seconds straight. I could not see any difference in the girl's face except a smirk . I really wanted to see the expression in her eyes but she was wearing her black glasses just like me . However I imagined that diameter of her eyeballs would have certainly increased by 30 % since this was the third straight question I didn't reply to . She then turned her face on the right towards her mother and said to her in french ," Its ok mom . times are bad nowadays. Nobody trusts the other person so easily as there are so many people out there who break your trust . This person must have had a bad night yesterday and does not seem to be in a good mood so lets leave him at peace " . I was amazed at the innocence in her reply . I was not expecting such a polished reply . I was instead expecting that she might resort to polite and refined abusing , say "get lost" in some sugary layered words and start talking to her mother , but this totally came as a surprise.
One hour journey had passed till now and I had started to feel really interested in this girl . I have always been someone who likes to talk and discuss on various topics . Hearing her talk to her mother , and that too sensibly on various topics related to french politics , french economy , immigration issues , ukraine and syria crisis ,european union descendancy and the ascendancy of asian powers , I felt even more attracted to her . She had already captured my attention with her way of talking, antics and beauty and now with her these talks she made me totally interested in starting a conversation with her . I always prefer brains to beauty in girls because brains last and beauty doesn't . This girl was a perfect fit for the kind of girl I would myself start a conversation with and continue .
I started feeling thirsty . I had already finished the small bottle that I had with me. i decided to go to the train cafeteria and get a bottle of water for me . I got up from my seat , my glasses still on and left for the cafeteria which was in coach no 4 to the left . I reached the counter . The guy at the counter said " Bonjour" (Hello ) but got no response from my side . I guess he must be used to such kind of clients . I showed him my empty bottle and gestured by hand what I wanted . He gave me a new bottle . I was collecting my change at the counter when I heard a lady asking for a sandwich and a coca cola . The voice seemed known. I turned to my right and saw she was the lady travelling with me , the pretty girl's mother . I saw her purchasing the sandwich and then put it on the eating table beside the counter. That meant she wanted to eat there itself in the cafeteria while enjoying the outside view . I quickly realized this was a good time to go back quickly to my seat and spend some time in front of the girl while her mother is away . I so much wanted to see her without her sunglasses and I courageously assumed she too wanted the same from my side as we both had not taken off our glasses since the time we had entered the train .
As soon as I got into my seat , she said , " Oh so you back from the cafeteria . I hope my mother is back soon too . Were there too many people at the cafeteria ? " .
Even this time she did not get any reply from me . I felt really bad this time . I saw her face pointing towards me with her sunglasses on . She was looking at me . I gestured to her with the bottle in my hand as if to ask if she wants some water . She was looking towards me but said nothing . I again gestured but again no response from her side . I felt pissed off at this behaviour of hers but she had got the same from my side as well not once but four times so I could understand the unavailability of a reaction from her side this time . Then, she smiled and as soon as she smiled, I forgave her in my mind (as if she was waiting for me to forgive her , and wanted to strike a conversation with her, talk to her , ask her about herself , get to know what she was doing in life , why she liked her sunglasses so much , why she did not react to my gesture ? Why was she travelling with her mother ? Did they stay in avignon ? if yes for what had had they come to Paris , how old was she ? Could we meet again if she stays in Paris . There was almost a big high wave of questions in mind ready to strike down on the shore but I could not . I just kept looking at her, totally mesmerised by her beauty .
Suddenly she turned her face towards me and I immediately turned my face towards the window as if to show that all this while I had been looking at the scenic view outside . I again heard something from her . Her husky voice broke the silence again . She said , " Are you staring at me ? If yes , then why are you not talking ?" I was shocked at hearing this and started thinking if she had already seen me looking at her all this while even though I had my sunglasses on . She leaned forward and put her hands on the table as if to say, "this time she was sure that she would get a reply from my side .There was no reply from my side . She waited for a minute in that posture and then leaned back on her seat now putting her left hand on the window sill and rested her right hand on her lap . She turned her face towards the window to the view outside . For me , this was the final nail in the coffin . I knew now she would not talk to me again . I was feeling gutted inside . I was helpless . I just wanted to talk, talk and keep talking to this girl and hoped the journey was not just for 3 hours .
Her mother returned from the cafe . She said , Clara , we are reaching avignon in 10 minutes . So, this pretty face had a name too and her name was Clara . I felt like saying , "Hi Clara , it was nice meeting you . Hope we meet soon ! but I could not . Oh how I wish I could say it at this moment .Soon the audio announcement came from the train's captain as well that we will be reaching Avignon in five minutes . People who had to get down in Avignon started getting up from their seats and collecting their bags from the cabin baggage space . Soon the train stopped at Avignon . The train had a halt of 2 minutes at the Avignon station . Almost all the passengers getting down here had vacated the train in the first 30 seconds . When the passageway became empty , the mother got up from her seat quickly , pulled down two backpacks and the coats from the cabin luggage space . She tied one to her shoulders and the other bag she put on the chair, opened the first zip and took out a ruler sized (30 cm) thin black coloured cylindrical rod . I still had my glares on and I was observing them . She flipped the instrument looking rod and it quickly became four times its length . It was actually a walking help cane . She helped Clara get out of her seat by holding her hand and then handed her the walking cane . For the first time , I saw Clara fumble in her movement while getting up from the chair . She looked for the table , rested her left hand ,came to the corridor (passageway) , took the cane from her mother and started walking . Soon she was out of the train and at the platform .
I was witnessing one of the most astonishing moments of my life . That pretty , vivacious girl was blind . I just froze for the moment and could not even wave my hand to say good bye . The train left the station in the next few seconds. I was unable to move for the moment . Shock had gripped me totally . I wanted to speak something . I opened my mouth and shut it down with an empty gulp . Before I could realise there was a lump in my throat and I could suddenly feel my chest become heavy . I was trying to swallow emptily to push down the lump from my throat but it wasn't working . I was indeed super shocked . I had some water and it surely helped calm down the nerves . I took off my glasses and went to the bathroom to wash my face . My eyes had become red . I washed my face thrice , wiped off the water with a tissue and came back to my seat . Still that uneasiness was there . It was as if somebody had taken away something which i had owned for sometime . I had prepared so many thoughts in my mind all through the 2.5 hours journey . I had visualised a picture of her as to , how she would be in her life with her friends . She must be full of energy , walking around , dancing around , talking to people around and mesmerising everyone with her beauty . She was a bunch of energy and just because of her, I didn't even realise how the two and a hour journey passed away as I was so busy adoring her . She obviously was oblivious of her beauty and she had talked to me so politely and humbly at all times when she asked me her questions . How could a person be so perfect ,thats what I was wondering . I wondered how God can be so cruel sometimes . How could he have done something like this to this little beauty with brains . I started imagining the plight of her family . I wanted to ask her earlier why was she travelling with her mother and now I knew that somebody had to be always there with her to take care of her . Oh this feeling was burning me from inside . Had I known I could have at least communicated with her in some manner .
Life is really a big puzzle which no one can ever solve . If only i could have written on a paper to let her know about me . I knew she would have felt amazing to get to know me and we could have been friends . I could have atleast written a note on a paper saying , "Your daughter is just amazing " and given it to her mother who would have communicated to her the message and I am sure she would have liked it so much . Most of time in our lives we stop ourselves from doing things which we want to do, or say, or communicate . Many a times its ego and many a times its helplessness. In my case here it was both . We let go of things until its too late to mend them . I could have written a note and maybe we could have got to know each other much better during the 2.5 hours that we spent together . We never know in what form life will present situations in front of us and at what time . If we hold ourselves back always, we will keep seeing life pass by and we will lose things which possibly could have been ours . Anyways what had happened had happened , I can't reverse the time anymore. I was 100 kms away from avignon with no contact detail whatsoever of the mother-daughter duo who travelled with me because I had not asked for it . Why did I hold myself back from communicating through written notes at least ? I could have done that . I was angry at myself . I didn’t care if she was blind . Her energy, her polite statements , her demeanour had brushed off on me like anything . I wanted to see her and give her a hug but I knew the moment was gone . We keep visualising in our lives that one day this moment will come and we will do such and such but when that moment finally shows up , sometimes in a mask , we bind ourselves either by our ego or helplessness and let the moment drift away and then the moment never comes back . We keep thinking how we have so many problems and its impossible to stay happy with so many problems and then god send us such examples which inspire us , encourage us to fall back in love with life and try to mend whatever wrong we have done till now with ourselves and others .
I was deeply engrossed in my thoughts when again the captain announced that we would be reaching Marseille in 5 minutes .People started getting off the train . I was last one to leave my coach with my backpack . I knew the the city of Marseille pretty well but didn't know the area near to the station so well . This was my third therapy session in the last 6 months. The last ones were in Paris and Lyon . I came out of the station and showed a paper with an address to a passerby. He quickly explained to me the address . I nodded my head and went towards the address . I finally reached the building . "National Institute of Therapy for communication disorders" , there was a big name plate on the gate .
Yes I was speech impaired . Seven months back when I woke up one morning ,the right side of my face was completely paralysed . I was rushed to the hospital by my friends . After 4 days of observation and complete inability to speak from my side , the doctors diagnosed it as " Dysarthria " . Its a condition in which speech production muscles go dormant for sometimes or in some cases they become totally dead. Thankfully in my case, they were just dormant .I had to do these therapy classed for three years and only then there would be a slight chance for me to recover by 70 % in my speech making abilities . I entered the building, showed my badge to the receptionist who guided me with a smile towards a classroom on the ground floor itself . There were already 7-8 people there while the instructor was still not present . I had reached 30 minutes before the class .
My mind was still occupied by the thoughts of Clara. What if I had told her about my problem ? What if I had written a note to her mother regarding why I was not able to reply ? Clara would have understood and we could have friends . Majority of the problems in our life arise due to our failure to discuss our situations . It could be ego which gives us a false sense of strength and makes us think that if we share our problems / deficiencies we would be seen / considered as weak by others . Today that ego had taken away something from me which could have "possibly" turned out to be a beautiful experience for me . Why most of us do it to ourselves ? Why do we let go when we could have done something regarding the situations in our life and why do we sit and regret later . Why don't we act right away ? What stops us from doing such ? I had slipped further into the valley of my negative thought and self introspection and suddenly a loud voice saying, " Hello everybody " pulled me right back from the deep valley of my thoughts .
He was a smart looking middle aged man with back brushed black hair . I would say of Tunisian origin by the look of his face . He informed us about the schedule of the day , the break timings and what all will we cover . It was a 5 hour class . I was trying to get back to my class mode when suddenly he announced , " Ok before we start the class today, I would want you all to write a small one page story about the moment when you felt the worst regarding your speech inability and you wish you you were not impaired .The moment you regret the most in your life due to this "impairment" . I didn't believe what he said but yes , I had heard it right . That was the topic . A smile appeared from nowhere on my face and as I put my black glasses on again , a tear had started running down from my left eye !
C'est la vie !
P. S : Life is always "Pain au chocolat " . Its we who take out the "chocolat" and make it "Pain nature" .
Note : All the situations and characters in this story are fictitious . Draw parallels only if you have too much free time and at your own risk .
- The Curious Wizard

Monday, August 18, 2014


दिल मे ख्वाईषों के पंख लिए जो उड़ा चला था मैं , प्यार मे तेरे जो गिरा था मैं .... कहाँ होश रह गया था मुझे की किस और अपनी ज़िंदगी का रुख़ मोड़ चुका था मैं ..... मुहब्बत ने जो ऐसी उड़ान दी थी इस परिंदे को , की भूल चुका था मैं इस आसमान की बंदिशें !!!! - The Curious Wizard

Thursday, May 15, 2014

कच्ची दीवारों को पक्का बनाया जा सकता है लेकिन पक्की दीवारों को कच्चा नहीं बनाया जा सकता . पक्की दीवारों को या तो और पक्का बनाया जा सकता है या फिर तोड़ा जा सकता है .

Sunday, October 20, 2013

पागल मन

जज़्बातों के ज़ुल्म के तले मैं दबा चला जा रहा था
खोखले से वादों की लहरों में मैं बहा चला जा रहा था
संग अपने यादों मे मैं आशियानों का मंज़र लिए जा रहा था ,
क्या पता था मुझे ,मैं तो बस काग़ज़ के बने इमारतों को आशियाना समझा जा रहा था
बातों के भंवर मे उनके मैं फिसलता चला जा रहा था ,
यह ज्ञांत ना था मुझे की मैं समंदर की गहराईओं मे और डूबता चला जा रहा था

पेड़ों के कुछ टहनिओन को मैने बगीचा समझ लिया था ,
धुले हुए कोयले को मैने सोना समझ लिया था ....
दीवारें लाँघ कर मिलने को मैने इकरार समझ लिया था और
आँखों से आँखें मिला कर बात करने को मैने प्यार समझ लिया था ...

नींद खुली, होश आया तो ध्यान आया की इस पागल मन ने तो खुद तो परवाना समझ लिया था....